My Official Response to Karl’s God-Tier Pop Eargasms

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By now I’m sure you’ve heard about Karl’s God-Tier Pop Eargasm article, this is the well-worded gist of it:

We all have our favorite pop eargasms. What makes an eargasm is not dextrous songwriting, complex verses or a skillful song structure. A song does not have to be envelope-pushing or exceptionally crafty to be addictive; I’m strictly talking about music that sounds so good it renders you speechless. We’re talking about sonic bliss. An ear full of ambrosia. Audible nectar.

It’s a great list, definitely some bangers on there. But God-Tier?

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I appreciate Karl trying to stay recent in the essence of what we do as music bloggers but I thought it only right I hit you with my God-Tier pop songs in official response to Karl’s.

By the way I’m supposed to be working on the playlist right now, so this is an official #ProcrastinationBlog.

Now God-Tier means the best of the very best, so excuse me while I don’t hold back here:

‘Irreplaceable’ – Beyonce

‘Heaven Is A Place On Earth’ – Belinda Carlisle

These YouTube links are coming in a little soft because they’re old, you’re gonna want to turn it up.

‘Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (A Man After Midnight)’ – ABBA

Bonus:

‘No Scrubs’ – TLC

‘Toxic’ – Britney Spears

At this point you can probably see that I’m not playing games, these are etched into the pop mount rushmore. Also this is my Britney Spears choice, obviously Baby One More Time and Oops I Did It Again are also God-Tier don’t @ me.

Eyeroll gif collection because God knows we need them on here. - Album on  Imgur

‘Just Dance’ – Lady Gaga, Colby O’Donis

Now obviously this is a controversial choice, everyone has their top Gaga banger. But in terms of just pure pop banger gotta go with the OG.

‘Dancing On My Own’ – Robyn

Call Your Girlfriend is also God-Tier. But this song… come on.

‘TiK ToK’ – Ke$ha

Timber and Die Young are also God-Tier.

‘Fantasy’ – Mariah Carey

‘White Houses’ – Vanessa Carlton

Saw Vanessa Carlton play Carole King in the CK musical on Broadway the last time I was in NY, she crushed it. The musical was great, even though I went in not knowing it only took place in and before the Tapestry era and not the underrated and better than Tapestry Wrap Around Joy Era (! yeah that’s right I said it, get over it)… We all know my thoughts in that tho…

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‘Complicated’ – Avril Lavigne

Sup my childhood?

‘Thriller’ – Michael Jackson

‘Flesh without Blood’ – Grimes

We all know Art Angels is one of my favorite albums of all time, so no brainer here.

‘Sol.’ – Mausi

My number one song of the decade right here.

‘Track 10’ – Charli XcX

‘Plastic Love’ – Mariya Takeuchi

Been listening to this since I was born. That’s actually kind of believable because I am Japanese but obviously I heard this on YouTube a few years ago and fell in love with it just like the rest of the internet. I truly think this is one of the most fascinating case studies in music history. Here’s a video explaining it in depth, but basically some glitch in the YouTube algorithm pushed this song onto everyone’s recommendations like 8 years ago and it amassed hundreds of millions of listens at no profit to the label because it was done independently, and also opened up all of those people to the Japanese pop sub-genre City Pop. The record label finally found out about it and took it down, much to my chagrin, but it seems like it’s back online now.

Also I scrolled a few comments down and this was literally on there so:

Yeah anyways just like Karl’s my list is not exhaustive. Let me know what I missed and how wrong I am and what the ACTUAL God-Tier pop songs are.

1 comments on “My Official Response to Karl’s God-Tier Pop Eargasms”

  1. I don’t know Mates, this looks an awful lot like the average pop listener’s God-Tier eargasm list.. not a lot of nuance til you get to Grimes! I appreciate your opinion though 🙂

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