Happy Valentine’s Day fam – self-designated cupid Classy Cassie back again this year for round two of Hot New Singles For You Hot Singles. Unattached and looking for love, these 14 musical singles hot and ready for your eardrums. Remember, the below dating profiles are for the music, not the artist.
Purple Disco Machine, Sophie and The Giants “In The Dark“
Dating Profile: This single is rebellious, independent, goes to the club alone to dance – don’t join this dance party unless you’re ready for a hot makeout sesh on the dance floor that begins and ends with a touch of the lips. Names? Occupation? None of it matters. Pucker up and get ready, this single is already dancing the night away.
Trinidad Cardona “Dinero (Bass Boost TikTok)“
Dating Profile: This “new and improved” single is back and ready to date….again. A messy history of gold diggers and unassuming sugar babies has left this single on a skeptic rollercoaster for the last few years – but who knows, maybe you’re the one to help this single feel trust again? Start off with a more casual date to check the vibe before jumping to high stakes dates.
Arlo Parks “Softly“
Dating Profile: Soft and gentle, you can take this single for their word. Genuine and authentic, this single will be happy Netflix and cuddling at home, out for a nightly cruise by the beach, or grabbing cocktails at a sexy low-lit bar. Helpful tip: prep strawberries and chocolate for the end of the night.
Charli XCX, Rina Sawayama “Beg For You“
Dating Profile: This powerhouse single is willing to fight for the connections they believe are genuine, and don’t hide behind their pride. They hold their heart close, but can recognize when someone is worth taking their guard down for. If this single opens up for you, hold them close and ride the vibe. Expect a romantic dinner and grab that sexy outfit you’ve been saving “for the right night”.
reggie “Slow Burn“
Dating Profile: Put me in coach, this single is reminiscent of a sultry Love & Basketball inspired late night one-on-one match. No shirts needed, meet at the court at midnight. Let’s go.
GAYLE “ur just horny“
Dating Profile: This hot single is new to Los Angeles and is trying to navigate through the sea of F-humans who are looking for a one-night stand (but unable to communicate it), and is naturally on a major f*^% you rampage. You might be able to convince this single to go on a date with you, but expect a lot of hesitation and skepticism. Helpful tips: stay off your phone and look them in the eye for a chance of greater connection.
Doja Cat “Celebrity Skin“
Dating Profile: This single is a former punk rocker who grew up on Avril, has deep nostalgia for the 90’s, spends half their time on @iamthirtyaf instagram and is definitely into Megan Fox and MFK drinking each other’s blood. Dress in grunge, and meet at the local music bar/pub and reminisce on your favorite 90’s artists.
Portugal. The Man “What, Me Worry?“
Dating Profile: Says they’re super California chill but actually has high functioning anxiety and will insist that they’re “not trippin'”, although it is very, very clear that they are indeed trippin’. This single loves long walks on the beach, not because they’re a romantic but because they’re working through shit and need the peace. They’re seemingly easy going and you’ll have a nice time with, but don’t be surprised when they go for insomniac smoke walks.
Nahima “Levitating“
Dating Profile: Sultry, confident…..and a somewhat slowed down and refined version of a recent ex? Do you have a type, or have you been here in another galaxy? Slow down and connect with this sexy single and you might unlock parts of themselves they lock away.
Saweetie, H.E.R. “Closer“
Dating Profile: This hot single is ready to take the lead – one of you will end up in handcuffs by the end of the night, and hopefully the sexy kind. You’re likely to end at their hotel as this hot single definitely has a quiet roster to attend to.
Rival, JAMICA, Costa Leon “Lost In Life“
Dating Profile: This single has spent the last couple years of lockdown really working on themselves and pursuing personal growth. Expect deep conversations, sharing tales of personal growth, and deep, passionate *evening moments* – just be careful of overzealous love bombing.
Arya, GOVAN “Hangover“
Dating Profile: This hot single is done being single and ready for love and stability after a seemingly never-ending amount of time spent working on themselves and romanticizing love during lockdown. This single has a TikTok “like” page filled with romantic ideas that would give a Pinterest board a run for its money. Expect a home made dinner with candles and rose petals and be prepared to end the evening in the tub together.
Spacey Jane “Sitting Up“
Dating Profile: This single is good times and won’t have a plan in advance, but will do their best work on the fly. If you’re down for a “Yes Night” that will leave you with a mental photo album of fun times, meet this single at the grocery store parking lot and see where the night takes you.
Fred again…, India Jordan “Admit It (U Don’t Want 2)”
Dating Profile: Summertime rooftop rave, let’s goooo. This single keeps the party going year round and has one of those fancy poolside rooftop bars in their home that would give Enes Yilmazer’s showings a run for their money. You might show up for this single, but once those daytime rays get your buzz going, you’ll be floating around and this hot single will end up just being the facilitating cupid.
